Sick Day(s)

Sick days number 2 and 3

I was planning on telling you I was sick yesterday, but I totally forgot to. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact I went to bed at 7. I'm guessing I'll be sick for a while longer, but I will be sure to post as soon as I am able.

Religion Day

Day 34

Today, I had to spend some time in a church. The closest thing to a church we have on campus is the Meeting House, the place where we go to sit in silence for 15 minutes every morning. This is a Quaker practice (my school is Quaker, which, contrary to popular belief, is a religion as well as an oatmeal), and, other than Quaker values (which pretty much anyone with moral integrity can at least relate to), it is the only religious practice that is pressed upon us. In collection (the 15 minutes of silence), we may worship anything or practice any religion, or contemplate the ins and outs of life (which could arguably have the same effect/significance of religion). This morning I speculated about various techniques of not falling asleep, I contemplated the meaning of sleep, and pondered various ways to increase the amount of sleep I get. While many times I find myself thinking about the deeper areas of life, just as much I think about sleep, food, and other things I don't get enough of (however will I reach Self-actualization?).
 
PS. My friend Misha finds it very important that I let you know that I did not get off scott-free yesterday. I was in fact presented with an ethical dilemma. I had the pleasure of dining with him and his girlfriend Rachel, and, as the meal neared its end, I left them all alone to perish in their loneliness (together).

Dining and Dashing

Day 33

Seeing as I'm at a boarding school, and tuition pays for all of my food, today doesn't actually present an ethical dilemma. I decided that simply leaving dinner early (before announcements, after which we are officially permitted to leave) would suffice.

Amnesty International Day

Day 32

Today, I was supposed to write a letter to a dictator urging him or her to stop torture. The barbed-wire-wrapped candle implied Amnesty International was involved, so I decided to accomplish this through them. The great thing about sending emails to dictators and such through Amnesty International is that you don't really have to do anything. They give you a nice pre-written email, and all you have to do is sign in and send click "send." Yes, it would be better to write an email myself, but in any case other than today, I would put it off until the day after I die. I didn't do exactly as directed- I sent an email to our own president, who is not technically a dictator. However, the United States being a country with a great deal of power and all, I decided to start locally, and email Obama. The message detailed the fact that countering terrorism with torture is pretty much just a big pile of crap. I liked what it said, and the way it was written (a tad more eloquently than my summary), so I sent it.

Paranormal Day

Day 31

Today, I kept an eye out for the paranormal. While I saw no ghosts, nor was I slapped by an invisible hand, I did have an experience that convinced me (for the day) that there is a government conspiracy against me.

Towards the end of the day, I did not feel like I had seen enough paranormal activity. What better place to be, then, than the graveyard during the full moon? Several of my friends and I walked out to the graveyard, mostly because it was a nice night, though I had the additional motive of hoping the dead would rise. Though my friend's "Hipster dance" did make her appear possessed, that was the extent of the para-normality that the graveyard had to offer. We decided to walk out to the bridge and watch the cars pass under us for a while. It was quite an enjoyable experience. A mix of contemplation and elation accompanied by high fives whenever a semi honked at us. The lights of the cars spread out over such a distance could actually be described as pretty. Not nearly as pretty as the red and blue lights behind us, though. Wait, where were those coming from? Yes, there was a police car pulling up behind us. We greeted him politely, though dazed. This was not something we had planned for the evening. He asked us what we were doing, and informed us that we were actually not simply looking at the cars, and that we were in fact throwing things. We explained that we were in actuality watching the cars and the moon, though it is possible that some of the gravel from the road may have been disturbed by our feet and thus plummeted down to the highway as the reports suggested. We seemed to sort out the matter well, and I was feeling confident about the state of our toes (one of us happened to be wearing sandals- in February), until a second police car pulled up.

We repeated the information to the second officer, and just as we finished, another car ambled down the road towards us, pulled over, and the two policemen inside got out. We were now detained by four police officers. One for each of us. The entire process was done with civility and respect on both sides, however, today being the day that it is, I have no option but to believe that these were no mere police officers.

Here is my theory:

The government has recognized that I am too intelligent for them, and will be likely to overthrow them and institute a better form of government (any suggestions?) in my future years. It is now their goal to build up a "crime" record for me in order to frame me for a crime I did not commit, thereby incarcerating me for the remainder of my life. The did, of course, send elite CIA operatives to accomplish this mission.

PS. Last night, I had a dream in which all of my friends were about 4 feet tall. No hedgehogs, though, nor airplanes. I'll have to try harder next time.

I Had the Strangest Dream...

Day 30

"Frued postulated that dreams are essentially the recombined elements of things that had effected us during the day. Today, think very hard about these three things and see if they crop up in your dreams tonight."
What are the three things? An airplane, a hedgehog, and a midget.
I spent most of chemistry class thinking about these things, and then decided to really get these things into my head by google-imaging them. Speaking of googleing things, I learned that "googlar" means "to google" in spanish class today.
Anyways, I looked intently at pictures of airplanes and midgets for a while, then moved onto hedgehogs. I have two things to say about hedgehogs. First of all, they are very cute. Second of all, it seems that people are rather obsessed with making "hedgehog cakes". It's the first suggestion it gives me when I type in "hedgehog." I thought that this could probably mean one of a few things. The obvious meaning would be a cake made of hedgehogs, however I'm not quite sure why several million people would search for images of this. Other than that, I suppose people could take after the medieval ages and put a live hedgehog (rather than a bird) inside a cake, only to have it pop out for the king's entertainment, though that's probably against some health code. The only remaining option (that I could think of) is that people make cakes intended to look like hedgehogs. A cake shaped like a hedgehog is kind of like a combination between calculus and Inception. The first because I don't understand it, and the second because there is no way I would ever come up with the original idea to make it.
I'm not sure how my dreams will go tonight, but I'll be sure to let you know tomorrow.

Nauru Day

Day 29

Today, I learned about Nauru. For those of you who don’t know, Nauru is one of the smallest countries in the world. It is an island spanning little more than eight miles across, containing roughly 9,267 people. My task today was to write a letter to the president of Nauru. Probably the best part about it is that his email address is the.president@naurugov.nr  the.president. how beast is that. Here’s what I wrote:

Mr. President,

Hello,

Until yesterday, I was not aware that your country even existed. However, upon learning more about it, I have come to the conclusion that I both enjoy the idea of it, and would love to visit it sometime. I am sure your people would be very welcoming.

Thank you for your time.

Here's what Aaron wrote:

Mr. President,

I have recently learned of your beautiful country, and am writing to express that I am excited to know of your amazing country. Thank you for being a really swell guy.

Ignore This Post

Day 28

Yesterday's task was to ignore that day. I didn't really know how to do that, but by the end of the day, as I looked back on it, all I did was what I was supposed to: Class, homework, work crews. In a month- even a week, I'll have pretty much forgotten about it. I think I did a pretty good job of ignoring yesterday.

Return/Another One?

Day 27

   I have returned! More importantly for you however, I have also started following my tasks again. I started right where I left off- day 27. 

   Despite its humor, I groaned as I turned to today's task- another prank call. While I enjoy a well thought out and executed prank call now and again, this is my third one in just over a month, and it seems a bit excessive. Isn't it time to give the people of America a break for a while? And when I say America, I mean it- or at least the United States part of it. I have now prank called each coast, as well as the middle of the US. 

   I chose California for two reasons. First because it's in a different time zone, and it was already a quarter past ten when I began, and secondly because it's very big population wise, which makes it less likely that I will end up calling someone I know (It's like a 5 in 36,961,664 chance). I searched for the California phone book on google, and picked Oakland as a more specific place, because my good friend lives there (which I guess defeats much of the purpose of choosing California in the first place). After I got the area code for that region, I realized I could have just looked up my friend's phone number on my phone. 

   The website I was on was very helpful. It even gave me the "top prefixes" in use, and the "most popular numbers searched," which greatly increased my chances of actually getting a person. The book did say to dial a random number, but I felt like I should get some idea of an area code. I randomized the last four digits of the phone number, and got someone on the first try. 

   At this point I was already feeling rather bad about prank-calling a random family. I think it was a child who answered- the connection was bad, so I couldn't hear very well. It took him about five minutes of phone-to-the-chest conversation before he managed to connect me with someone whose voice sounded like it belonged to the father. They were definitely speaking another language (not spanish), which only helped with the image in my mind of a poor immigrant family trying to enjoy dinner- a rare time when all of them gathered together after a long day's work. I was, of course, the antagonist in any story I concocted around this family, breaking apart their time together, and shattering their joy with my heartless humor.

   I looked down at the book in my lap, and as directed, proceeded to read the script in a deep southern accent. I couldn't decide whether it was disturbing or boring- it was basically a lot of hardcore evangelical christian text. Religion, especially when stating one's opinion about it on the world wide web, is a touchy subject. I don't have anything against religion overall. Well actually, I am against how it has been (and is being) used in some cases, and I certainly have qualms with the way many sects of all types of religions are operating, but I think religion has also done plenty of good in the world. However it is hard for me to be open to the more hardcore religious beliefs- beliefs which this script embodied rather thoroughly. 

   Despite my apprehension about it, I began to read the tiny words in front of me, wishing he would hang up before I had a chance to read too much. Really wishing that he didn't agree with everything I was saying. It seems though, that despite what I was doing, the universe was on my side, and as i neared the end of the first paragraph, I heard the little "beep-boop" that signified the call had been terminated. Thank god I thought ironically.

Affirmative/Negative

Day 26

Today, I attempted to avoid saying the words yes and no. Yes, I just added another three to my list today, but that's not a whole lot considering my miserable failure during the rest of the day as well. Luckily for me, the book (or its authors) anticipated this, and directed me to follow these directions for as long as I could, rather than all day with no exceptions. I think I lasted about ten minutes, though that number is disputed among my friends and acquaintances.
In other news, I'm going on a cross-country ski trip for the next week or so in a place without internet, so I won't be able to post until 8 or 9 days from now. Sad, I know- how else will you keep yourselves entertained? Be it known that I am not liable for panic attacks induced by blog withdrawal.
See you all (kind of) next week.

Reincarnation Day

Day 25

So, I'm quite tired, and I have a test tomorrow, so I'll make this quick. I had to choose what I want to be reincarnated as. My choices ranged from a multitude of animals (including dinosaurs) to a violin, a hot girl, or an American flag. Eventually, I chose to be an astronaut. I figure that's probably a pretty exciting job. Better than a rocking horse anyhow.

Things I Will Never Do Before I Die

Day 24

The directions, to check off each of the boxes in order to come to terms with the fact that I will never accomplish its respective task in my lifetime, were written in small print at the top of the page. The rest of it was filled with several seemingly endless rows of things I will probably never do. Everything from climbing Mount Everest or saving the world to using a semicolon or compromising. I went through them one by one, checking off most of them. No, I'll probably never learn Italian, nor will I go to a drive in cinema or invent a cookie. As much as I would like to do these things, I probably never will. Others were easier to part with. I was fine checking the boxes next to "Contract an STD" "Shoot the last buffalo" or "Ride a Harley." Some I had already accomplished, though they weren't nearly as interesting as many of the others. There were a few that I refused to check, however. I plan to write a novel at some point in my life, I certainly mean to ride a camel as well as run for my life, and I even intend to "volunteer for a dangerous mission" (I don't really know what that means, but I'm pretty sure it only happens in movies). I believe that today has helped me focus my life goals in a more, yet simultaneously less, realistic way. Really, all it did was cut out some old ideas and put a bunch of new ones right back in. Many of them are really quite interesting- if you're ever bored, try to complete some of these.

Barter Day

Day 23

Today there was a blizzard. That didn't actually have anything to do with the book, but it played a major role in my day, so I thought it was worth mentioning. Other than the blizzard, I bartered with people to get what I want rather than paying them. The problem is that I don't really pay anybody for anything on a normal day. In fact, tuition covers pretty much all of my needs day to day. There wasn't much difficulty finding something to barter for, though. That blizzard I mentioned? I traded a pop-tart for the chance to wrestle an acquaintance in the 5 ft drifts of the blizzard. I figured my task was more or less completed for the day, and proceeded to enjoy the weather for the rest of the night.